Man!  Just a few moments ago I answered the phone when I noticed a familiar number on my caller ID when I decided to put an end to all of that.  I answered the phone with a deeper voice and listened to the sales pitch on why I should apply for a Discover Credit Card and so on.  Deep inside I felt very upset and I wanted to yell out loud that I did not want their card, but I calmly and flatly reminded the saleslady that I am tired of getting all their calls at all times of the day for the last six months and not to mention their pile of junk mail that I get in my mailbox quite often.  She persisted in trying to convince me to apply, but I had made up my mind since I already have 4 credit cards and nothing would change my mind (unless she would pay my credit cards for me *LOL* I'm kidding!), and I wanted to keep the good credit score that I have right now.  I only raised my voice slightly and tried not to go Eric Cartman on her. 

She agreed to let me go after a while.  After the end of the conversation, I actually congratulated myself for remaining calm and professional thoughout the conversation even though I was very pissed off on the inside.  I had to remind myself that 1) I wouldn't be a gentleman if I treated a lady like that, 2) she was only doing her job and she has to feed herself and probably a family too, and 3) I know what it is like working in customer service specially in selling.

At the end I decided to see what I could do to stop all the junk mail for credit card offers and I found this website that can help you opt-out from being pre-screened/pre-approved for offers (and I checked before that it is legitimate):

 https://www.optoutprescreen.com/?rf=t

and also checkout these too...

https://www.dmachoice.org/dma/member/home.action;jsessionid=165885A0C4AB60EAA7E6BD5A387667CC.tomcat2#

http://www.fraudguides.com/tips/jan10.asp

I don't know where my life is heading into.  The last few days I have felt very unmotivated to do anything, so all I have been doing runs the same simple cycle:  eating, sleeping, and working, and repeat.  In all years of my life this is perhaps the first time that I feel that my mind is blank and void of any dreams or goals.  Now I don't feel exactly sad (although there are a few short episodes), but I feel that I am entering some nihilistic dilemma.  

I feel that there is no purpose in trying or working hard for any goals.  I have come to the point that I believe that my life and existence is nothing more than a false illusion, or at least a small series of false illusions.  I have seen some of my most important beliefs and ideas being shattered over and over again so that they are not worth fighting for anymore.  I no longer know what "truth" is, even for me.  I have found this reality to be quite chaotic and distorted.  Unfortunately, some of my co-workers and family have noticed my change in attitude and easily attribute it to me being a "bad" person.  These few days I have engaged in some activities that I normally don't do such as drinking more and smoking, among a few.  Is there another "true" reality for me?  Is my life nothing more than a lie like a crumpled-up piece of paper discarded by a novelist like any bad plot?

I feel that that I have one body (my shell), one soul, and two minds and I can sense the difference between the two, although they are in conflict.  Yet, I sense that there is another reality where my life would have taken a very different turn being optimistic, goal-driven, ambitious, and using the best of my ideas, knowledge and creativity to the fullest and to my advantage, complete with milestones I could always look back to for inspiration.  At the same time while I know I would be very happy with this alternate reality, it all seems very strange and distant for me.  I know I may have all the potential of making this reality come to life, I just cannot come to bring it all out.  It may just result into another false illusion.  No, no matter what!

If there was a way for anyone else to feel what I feel other than through my words, I think this little piece of music does describes it pretty well:

Jan Boerman's Tellurisch

So I was looking around through the financial pages when I came across this article which gives a pretty good job in giving an insight to the primary reason why Washington Mutual collapsed.  In fact it portrays a great example of the shoddy lending practices of many of the companies involved in Subprime lending and their greed.

http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/11/02/business/morgen03.php?page=1


"'At WaMu it wasn't about the quality of the loans; it was about the numbers,' Cooper says. 'They didn't care if we were giving loans to people that didn't qualify. Instead, it was how many loans did you guys close and fund?'"

When I was working for Wells Fargo it was commonly known that Wells Fargo took due diligence in reviewing any type of financing (i.e. personal loans, lines of credit, auto loans, mortgages, etc.) and it was not easy to get it.    Among other factors Wells Fargo often required a credit score of at least 700 to qualify, so if in fact you did qualify, you knew you had good credit.  While Wells Fargo did also pushed for sales figures like other financial institutions, it also emphasized quality.

I have to admit that it was no surprise that Washington Mutual failed as I had been thinking for months.  In fact anyone with some basic knowledge of reading financial statements and its 10-k, anyone could have easily seen its demise.  In 2005 it had even purchased subprime credit card lender Providian, a sign that Washington Mutual had been taking on too much risk.

Personally I don't know but when a company releases a commercial like this, I don't take it seriously as a financial institution:



Those bad puppies almost licked all his bank account clean!  Oh, wait, they did licked clean all the Washington Mutual bondholders' and stockholders' money!

Today I went to volunteer at my local United Way and I was asked to create a new database of all volunteers using Microsoft Excel.  After completing that database and a few other things, I felt much better because not only did I keep busy but also knowing that I volunteered.  The director of that chapter can help me out in finding a job since she has plenty of good contacts in the local area.  Many of them are in the board of directors for their chapter.  I shall return tomorrow.

Now for other news I found a good wallpaper and skin that I am finally satisfied with, as I have never found one that I truly enjoy.  For most of the time I have used that Windows 2000 skin as it was the only one that I thought looked clean and professional, but I could not resist this one!  Real name edited out for privacy purposes.



 

Like usually the following is just part of another larger dream and the reason I'm talking about it in the first place is because there is something that stands out for me:

In the dream I was in a building in San Antonio and was about to get in an elevator when the doors open.  When I proceded to come in there was a girl there and apparently was a tourist and was beginning to speak with me.  This girl was about my age and height, but she had green eyes, short dark brown hair, and a bit slim.  From what I could tell she was indeed a British tourist and was a student in the UK.  I think we were talking about details about San Antonio and commenting how wonderful it is.  When we got off from the elevator, we took our ways but deep inside I wanted to tell her that she should come back and I would love being her tour guide on her next trip (despite my little knowledge of the city).   Of course being a bit shy and insecure, I kept it to myself.  As I walked forward I could tell I was in downtown San Antonio not far from the Alamo, but it looked a bit more surrealistic with bigger buildings and cathedrals and the scene looked like there was a Mardi Gras celabration going on.  Whoa!  It must have been a reflection of my recent unexpected trip to San Antonio.

===================================================================

Yikes!  Now lately whenever I speak to my mother in Spanish, I can't help but notice it has been faltering.  To my ears my Spanish now sounds a bit fractured and a bit Tex-Mex, despite efforts to speak a more formal, standardized Mexican Spanish.

I think the reason is not just because I live in this part of the U.S. (the prime reason), but also reading/listening/watching a lot of material in British English (I even jokingly speak with a British accent with a couple of friends/co-workers).  Oh, yeah, I also practice French in some of my spare time. 

I was working on my new set of goals while I had the TV on in the living room earlier this evening.  The only thing that caught my attention was that show "Ghost Whisperer" with Jennifer Love Hewitt so I left it on. 

As I took a quick glance I saw a scene where the lead character Melinda Gordon (played by none other than Jennifer Love Hewitt) was in the kitchen with her husband talking.  Then she begin to drink down this glass full of Pinot Grigio so quickly.  I don't know but I thought she looked so sexy doing that!  I mean she's already gorgeous, but that scene just put it over the top! *howls*

Thus, that inspired the addition of a new entry on my LiveJournal list of interests.  

Just this morning one of my uncles called to see if he could borrow one of those carry-on trailers (http://www.mytscstore.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay_10551_10001_33675_-1______14297%7C14337%7C14342%7C33675?listingPage=true&Special=false) that a friend of my brother's lent to us.  I told him that it wasn't really ours, but he could call my brother if he would let him use it.  I did tell him though that it was not going to be easy to take out because it was behind a couple of SUVs and it was full of plywood boards.

After the call ended it just hit me something that my brother had said.  My relatives only call my mother whenever they need something from her and never even bother to call and greet us once in a while.  As we were preparing for Ike last week she was calling everyone else to see if they were OK and if they needed me to book a room online for them.  Now that the hurricane is over, except for a few relatives, not one of them has called to make sure we were fine, including this uncle who called.  My mother seems to worry about everyone else, but they don't return the favor. 

All right I have been tired of doing and earning nothing (besides looking for a another job) and then it hit me...why not try out for a substitute teacher?  People have often told me I would make a great teacher because of my encyclopedic knowledge and the way I sound when I train someone.  Coupled that with my occassional British accent, I would make one fine British professor, a bit like Mary Poppins except not a nanny and a dude.   I bet that would be Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Hee, hee, I just noticed I'm wearing the same clothes that I'm wearing on the avatar!  I just need a full moon for the full transformation!

Animation 

Since I was a child I have always loved animation to this day.  I like to think of it as a wonderful medium in which fantasy, emotion, and other abstract subjects can come to life.  I have some great ideas in my head that I want to express for other people to see, but I do not have the ability to produce them on pencil, color, crayon, marker, etc.

Books 

Since I was a child I have been an avid reader.  You would rather see me reading a book than socializing, even today, although I have developed more friendships as I've grown.  In my life I have read probably at least 2,000 books and I have my own private collection of them.  Most of the books I read tend to be non-ficton usually about the subjects I have listed in my User Info.

Economics 

Economics....I really don't have much to say about this one except that I'm very interested (particularly supply-side economics) in and there is no "exciting" explanation for it.  Would you please choose another one?

Security analysis 

Since I tend to be very careful about money, I used to notice the financial news on the newspaper and on TV and wondered what that all meant.  "How can people make more money using just their money?" I basically asked myself.  When I started college I began to look more into it and that's when I took a very keen interest in stocks, bonds, and mutual funds.

Once a week or so I like to visit some websites detailing the main features of their financial products in their prospectuses.  I like to envision myself how would I invest my money once I find a stable job and save a reasonable amount of money.  I would probably have a 401(k) for my retirement that focuses mostly (probably at least 90%) on stocks since retirement is a long time from now.  I would have another portfolio for general investing, but it would be less risky like a balanced fund (60% Stocks/40% Bonds) or maybe even a bond portfolio.  I have taken an interest in those Socially Responsible Investing funds probably partly out of curiousity, but whether I would invest or not would depend on their performance.  Of course I would also have some highly liquid funds for short-term needs and emergencies in the form of Money Market funds and savings accounts.

Religion 

I am interested in religion not in the sense that I want to subscribe to a specific doctrine.  I prefer to think of religion as a double-edged sword that can cause great damage when used by people with the wrong intentions, but it can also be a great source of happiness and spiritual tranquility.  I prefer to focus on the latter, of course.

My interest in religion can be described more of a comparative study of religions in general without being a member of any particular faith or denomination.  I guess my Deistic point of view reinforced by the writings of Voltaire, Jefferson, and Paine have strongly influenced my view.

Furry fandom 

Oh, man!  Since I was a child I always like to see anthro characters on TV, literature, and the media, specially the talking characters.  Furry-style costumes, plushies, and puppets always caught my attention.  Back in 1996 I even had a dream that a once-famous circus was replaced by a particular act involving people in furry costumes to great popular appeal.

I have always like real animals in the sense they can make great pets and sometimes I sensed that we could somehow communicate, although you could say the same thing about any animal lover.

When I came across the Dogz R. Barkin's website (now defunct, unfortunately) back in 2005 and saw the fursuit galleries and drawings and the repeated use of the word furry, then I knew there was a word for this sort of fascination after looking up the definition.

To this day I have been contemplating about creating either a mini comic strip or a short story involving my main character Silas G. T. Brontë, as I would like for him to become alive rather than remaining just as a one-dimensional character.  I am currently developing a secondary fursona (a kangaroo) based on some of my other characteristics, particularly the silly, jokester archetype I normally display at work although more athletic.

Unusual facts
 
What else to say?  I just love interesting, odd facts particularly from Ripley's Believe it or Not.  I guess it goes in hand with my slightly eccentric personality. 

Nothing new these days, except that I have changed my diet and workouts because I wasn't getting anywhere.  For starters I was eating too many carbohydrates and the exercises only emphasized strength.  I already lost two pound this week of what I assume is fat from that high carbohydrate consumption.  At work I am making more sales so I got that covered for now.

Now although many of you may not understand Spanish, I thought I would post this video.  It's basically the intro to "La Movida" an old night show produced by Televisa in the early 90s.  I remembered the tune of the show since I was like 8 or so and I was glad when I came across it recently.  It was hosted by Mexico's favorite diva, the great Veronica Castro.

Comments:  Gosh this brings so many memories!  Not only was the tune catchy and Veronica Castro looks so sexy with that KILLER smile on 1:32-1:41, but I love the fact that it's slightly furry as you all can tell by the animal characters.  For some reason I forgot pretty much about the animals until I saw this recently.  I love the rooster sequence as he smacks his lips/beak as he walks past those smooth female legs.  This stuff is Grade "A". 

What a shame that it got cancelled after a few years.

Urgh...nothing special this weekend.  I tried to dowload and install Object Desktop from Stardock, but it keeps saying it's not connected to the Internet while I can still go browse online otherwise.  Wierd!  I tried calling phone support, but that hasn't worked either. Maybe that explains why I haven't received any responses to the e-mail I've been sending lately.  I shall try again tomorrow.  As for my vacation I'm now thinking of going to Houston for my short vacation as I would save a lot on travel.  I just want to be away from home for a while and explore on my own.

So for this week I've got this video from the group Depeche Mode playing their 1987 hit "Strangelove".  Now Depeche Mode released two video versions of this song one for the European audience (this one) and another for the American one. The first time I heard it on the radio on my way to my dorm room after staying at home with mother for the weekend.  The moment I heard it on the radio I was hooked on it and I wanted to look for it.  After a search on the radio station's website, I found the name and the group who performed it.  This is among my top ten personal favorite songs of all time.

Comments:  Man, as I've been saying I've been hooked on this song since I first heard it.  After seeing both versions I think the European version is way better hands down!  Not only does it have a catchy tune, but the whole dark, sophisticated, mysterious atmosphere combined with beautiful women is just dreamy.

Every week around the weekend I shall post ONE video from my personal "Favorite" YouTube collection into my LiveJournal.  It's just a little glimpse of the little amusing oddities that I find across the Web.

For starters here's a UK Pepsi TV ad that originally aired in 1974, featuring among other things this Danish "delicacy" ;-)


Commentary:  Not only would I have wished meeting a lady like this, but the catchphrase at the end is totally friggin' cool! 

*lipsmackinthirstquenchinacetastinmotivatingoodbuzzincooltalkinhighwalkinfastlivinevergivincoolfizzin*

...oh that reminds me....

*supercalifragilisticexpialidocious*

Just for the fun of it and thanks to skylarhusky, I'm going to list some facts about myself:

1)  I was born originally in Mexico and came in 1996, but I have lived almost half my life in the U.S.  I hope to become an American citizen and I would LOVE to have my citizenship ceremony on the Fourth of July, although that won't be possible until 2009 at the earliest.

2)  During my sophomore year in High School, I was both taking French and ESL (English as a Second Language) at the same time!  I could have taken Spanish as a "foreign" language and make an easy "A", but I wanted a challenge and I successfully passed French with "A"s.  Quelle surprise, n'est-ce pas?  Je suis très hérèux de parler en Français!

3)  By nature during first impressions I tend to be overly quiet and serious when meeting new people.  When I get used to some people, I've been known for being such a goof-off, with a talent for puns, wordplay, and wit.

4)  I have been a vegetarian since October 1996, but even before then I ate little meat.  I started the process when I was about 4 and from then I slowly lost my appetite for meat.

5)  Although I don't drink that much, whenever I get a little drunk I start talking with an English accent pretending to be a fictitious Prime Minister from the Victorian era.  One day in my dorm room in college I got drunk with my roommate and some friends next doors, and out of nowhere I started singing from the HMS Pinafore "When I Was a Lad."  They got a kick out of that!

6)  My mother apparently named me after some character from a Mexican soap opera that was running at the time.

7)  I have been known for having an almost encyclopedic knowledge from almost any country in the world that some people that I have met from places as far as Kazakhstan, Latvia, and Ghana are impressed I have about their countries, including some rather obscure facts.

I shall tag...

-anonamoose
-damienhusky
-paradiseforlorn
-mishicougar
-spats_bear
-famopup
- otakuoftomobiki